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No Nursing Home For Me!
About 2 years ago my husband I were on a cruise
through the western Mediterranean aboard a Princess
Cruise Liner. At dinner we noticed an elderly lady
sitting alone along the rail of the grand stairway in
the main dining room. I also noticed that all the staff,
ships officers, waiters, busboys, etc., all seemed to
know this lady.
I asked
our waiter who the lady was, expecting to be told that
she owned the cruise liner, but he said he only knew
that she had been on board for the last four cruises,
back to back. As we left the dining room one evening I
caught her eye and stopped to say hello. We chatted and
I said, "I understand you've been on this ship for the
last four cruises."
She replied, "Yes, that's true."
I stated, "I don't understand"
She replied, without a pause, "It's cheaper than a
nursing home."
So, since then, I have decided that there will be no
nursing home in my future. When I get old and feeble, I
am going to get on a Princess Cruise Ship. The average
cost for a nursing home is $200 per day. I have checked
on reservations at Princess and I can get a long term
discount and senior discount price of $135 per day.
That leaves $65. A day for:
1. Gratuities which will only be $10 per day.
2. I will have as many as 10 meals a day if I can waddle
to the restaurant, or I can have room service (which
means I can have breakfast in bed every day of the
week)...no extra charge.
3. Princess has as many as three swimming pools, a
workout room, free washers and dryers, and shows every
night...all at my disposal.
4. They have free toothpaste, razors, soap and shampoo
and hand lotion.
5 They will even treat you like a customer, not a
patient. Oh, and extra $5 worth of tips will have the
entire staff scrambling to help you.
6. I will get to meet new people every 7 or 14 days.
7. TV not working? Light bulb needs changing? Need to
have the mattress replaced? No problem! They will fix
or replace everything and apologize for your
inconvenience.
8. Clean sheets and towels every day, and you don't even
have to ask for them.
9. If you fall in the nursing home and break a hip you
are on Medicare; if you fall and break a hip on the
Princess ship they will upgrade you to a suite for the
rest of your life.
Now hold on for the best..................
Do you want to see South America, the Panama Canal,
Tahiti, Australia, New Zealand, Asia, or name where you
want to go? Princess will have a ship ready to go when
you are ready to see the world in style! So don't look
for me in a nursing home, just call shore to ship.
PS: And don't forget, when you die - they just dump you
over the side at no charge."
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