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Quips & Questions
After all is said and done, usually
more is said than done.
I am a nobody, nobody is perfect,
therefore I am perfect.
“No one ever says “it’s only a game”,
when their team is winning.”
“If carrots are so good for your
eyes, how come I see so many dead rabbits on the
highway?”
Why is it that most nudists are
people you don’t want to see naked?
I earn a seven-figure salary.
Unfortunately, there’s a decimal point involved.
The next time you feel like
complaining, remember: your garbage disposal
probably eats better than thirty percent of the
people in this world.
Snowmen fall from Heaven unassembled.
Home is where you can say anything
you like ‘cause nobody listens anyway.
I live in my own little world, but
it’s OK, they know me here.
Dyslexia means never having to say
you’re yrros.
I see your IQ test results were
negative.
Regular naps prevent old
age…especially if you take them while driving.
How much can I get away with and
still go to heaven?
I think your problem is low
self-esteem. It is very common among losers.
The most precious thing we have is
life. Yet it has absolutely no trade-in value.
Travel is very educational. I can now
say “Kaopectate” in seven different languages.
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