|
|
| |
|
|
| |
Conspiracy Against
Seniors
(Submitted - original author unknown)
We Must Stop This Immediately!
Have
you noticed that stairs are getting steeper.
Groceries are heavier. And, everything is further
away. Yesterday I walked to the corner and I was
dumbfounded to discover how long our street had
become!
And, you know, people are less considerate now,
especially the young ones. They speak in whispers
all the time! If you ask them to speak up they just
keep repeating themselves, endlessly mouthing the
same silent message until they're red in the face!
What do they think I am, a lip reader?
I also think they are much younger than I was at the
same age. On the other hand, people my own age are
so much older than I am. I ran into an old friend
the other day and she has aged so much that she
didn't even recognize me.
I got to thinking about the poor dear while I was
combing my hair this morning, and in doing so, I
glanced at my own reflection .. . well, REALLY NOW -
even mirrors are not made the way they used to be!
Another thing, everyone drives so fast these days!
You're risking life and limb if you happen to pull
onto the freeway in front of them. All I can say
is, their brakes must wear out awfully fast, the way
I see them screech and swerve in my rear view
mirror.
Clothing manufacturers are less civilized these
days. Why else would they suddenly start labeling a
size 10 or 12 dress as 18 or 20? Do they think no
one notices?
The people who make bathroom scales are pulling the
same prank. Do they think I actually 'believe' the
number I see on that dial? HA! I would never let
myself weigh that much! Just who do these people
think they're fooling?
I'd
like to call up someone in authority to report
what's going on -- but the telephone company is in
on the conspiracy too: they've printed the phone
books in such small type that no one could ever find
a number in there!
All I can do is pass along this warning:
WE
ARE UNDER ATTACK!
Unless something drastic happens, pretty soon
everyone will have to suffer these awful
indignities.
PS: I am writing this in a larger font size, because
something has happened to my computer's fonts - they
are smaller than they once were.
|
|
Click
here for more humor |
|
 |
|
|
|
It's easy to stay up to date on the things that interest you. Just
